In delusional America, many of us act as though we are living in Lake Wobegon where, as Garrison Keillor tells us every Saturday on NPR that “all the children are above average.” Of course, we know that intelligence is actually distributed among the human population in the form of a bell curve, with equal numbers of people above and below average. People have always been sensitive about any suggestion that they, or their children, are below average in intelligence, reasoning, or knowledge. Calling a person stupid, dumb, retarded, or ignorant is taken as a major insult. More recently, however, using these words in any context has become offensive, much like using profanity. Just now, I looked up the word “retarded” in the Encarta Dictionary, and I was not surprised to read this definition: “An offensive term meaning intellectually or emotionally challenged.” It has become the “r-word”.
Not so long ago, a student wrote on an evaluation of my graduate-level psychological testing course, “He is very insensitive and unprofessional. A psychologist should never use such a disgusting term as mentally retarded.” Well, excuse me! I was using the diagnostic term that is in the American Psychiatric Association’s current Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) (Fourth Edition, 1994). But, I must add, that the American Psychiatric Association will soon be publishing the DSM-V, and they are changing the term to Intellectual Disabilities because they feel that Mental Retardation is considered to be pejorative. Fascinating. The APA, the expert source on psychiatric disorders, is changing its own terminology because the lay public has become offended by neutral words that are appropriately descriptive.
Of course, this is nothing new when it comes to how people deal with words that are used to describe serious deficiencies in intelligence. Words like cretin, feeble-minded, moron, imbecile, and idiot, which used to be the appropriate medical terminology, all came to be perceived as being too offensive to use by both medical professionals and the general public. These words were gradually replaced, through the first half of the twentieth century, by the term mental retardation, because it was considered a neutral, inoffensive term. And now, on the euphemism treadmill, we have intellectual disabilities to replace the r-word.
So, what is this really about? It seems as though most of our society is offended by any words that even suggests below average intelligence, as though they are living in the lala-land of Lake Wobegon. Speaking professionally, as a person who has administered one type of intelligence test or another to more than 10,000 people, I have had no problem with the concept of mental retardation or the term. The fact is that, either by genetics, accident, or social/cultural impoverishment, more than 2 of every 100 people in the world are far enough below average in their general intellectual functioning to be considered mentally retarded.
Speaking personally, however, it has been quite a different story. You see, my wonderful, handsome, loving, and loveable 36 year-old son has been mentally retarded since the age of 13 months when he suffered a very high fever of unknown etiology. The fever caused seizures and brain damage, dramatically altering the course of all of our lives. In case you couldn’t read the tiny font, let me explain that, as a parent, I have received the disapproval of many people when I’ve used the term, so I have to be careful about saying it too loud. I’ve actually had people scold me for saying mentally retarded, telling me that my son would outgrow it, that everybody has special talents, and suggesting that I was ignorant and crude for uttering the r-word.
At first, it was very hard for me to accept my son’s diagnosis, having dreamt of a perfect, gifted child who would be a source of pride and joy for me and my wife for the rest of our lives. It took some time to get over our sadness, but we came to realize that he is as perfect as anybody, since we all have imperfections; that he is gifted in many ways (loved by all who know him, kind and accepting, a terrific and joyful distance runner, and much, much more); and, along with our beautiful daughter (I'll brag about her in a future post), our greatest source of pride and joy. So, if I can accept the term mentally retarded, then I don’t think it should be very difficult for those in our society who may not be as intimately involved. But in a Lake Wobegon society where grade inflation is through the roof, where half the college grads graduate with honors, where every kid in little league gets a trophy even if his team takes last place, where the winner has to apologize to the loser for winning a game by a lopsided score, and where anybody (including the truly stupid) can get their 15 minutes of fame and hero worship, it really is not surprising. Without a doubt, many among us will continue to make a display of how offended they are by others who use words like stupid, dumb, ignorant, or retarded. Any bets on how long it will take for the term intellectually disabled to become an epithet?
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